I made a thing
thank god someone made this! :D great xD
Reblogging for my asexual bestie!
Lately it seems like most of the activity on this blog is people asking me to tell them how they should identify. I am not entirely comfortable with that and am going to stop answer those kinds of questions for awhile.
Would it be helpful if I posted a list of terms, definitions, and such? There may have been one posted before, but I could make a page with a permanent link if people are interested.
anonymous asked: could you explain greysexuality?
I couldn’t think of anything unique or interesting to post this weekend, sorry. This blog has a lot of followers, though, so I thought I could try posting a discussion question. I know discussions on tumblr don’t work as well as on other sites, but reblogging works ok.
So, onto the question! Do you identify as queer based on your gray-a/demi identity? What about GSM (“gender and/or sexual minority” in this case sexual minority)?
I personally identify as queer for other reasons and being gray-a is part of my GSM identity, but not my queer one.
I want to do a post of some sort this weekend, but I don’t really know what you all are interested in seeing. If you want to send in some topics, questions, or your own thoughts on gray-a/demi issues, please do!
Please send an askbox message or Fan Mail to metapianycist if interested. Please signal boost this post, if you can.
That you would have sexual activity with someone is only a description of behavior, and not a description of attraction. What would your reasons be for having sex? If they include sexual attraction to the person, or some sexual desire akin to it, you might be gray. You might be demisexual, if when you experience sexual attraction, it is with duration and intensity regarded as conventional. You might even be both gray and demi (neither is a category of the other). You’ve told me about your probable behavior, but not about your mental states. Only you can decide if you are gray-asexual, demisexual or both.
As for myself, I am neither gray nor demi, and I have enjoyed and do enjoy some sexual activities. My reasons for enjoying those things don’t include anything akin to sexual attraction, so I identify as asexual without further descriptors.
The Kinsey scale doesn’t adequately account for the existence of trans* people, so I cannot really say what counts as “same-sex” sexual attraction for me. And I’m not entirely certain whether or not how I experience sexual desires when I have them fit the bill for what is considered sexual attraction. I call myself mostly-gay, but the “gay” part of that is a reference to sensual attraction, not sexual or romantic attraction. I’m nonromantic.
Submitted by nonhumanquotes.
For me, being grey-asexual is a collection of things. I don’t have strong sex drive, I don’t have strong sexual attraction to people. I do have it sometimes, but, it’s not a need, and, I don’t really understand when people say that the drive for sex frustrates them and it’s something they can’t ignore, because, for me if I ignore it for a time, it goes away. Also, I’m autistic so, working out social cues, and touch, can be uncomfortable and stressful things for me.
For me, sex is something that only works in particular situations, with particular people… I’m not demi, it’s not about how close I am with someone (I also have a hard time with romance, so, actually, it might be more easy for me if it’s a friend but not a romantic relationship, I think), but, it’s about if that person can do things in a way that makes it less stressful for me.
A lot of talk about how to work out consent, goes the opposite way for me because I become very stressed by working out “if I want something”. So, people who are super fixed on talking about consent, doesn’t work for me I think. So, stuff is difficult and, mostly I avoid it.