To that Anon who was raped--I just wanted to say that yes, you should seek counseling if you feel like those experiences are stopping you from doing certain things YOU would like to do, or if they're interfering with your happiness to this day. Abuse is not something you fully get over, but you can recover from it. :) However, don't feel pressured to feel some sort of sexual attraction; if you dont its OK. Some people are just different, and you can still be happy/fulfilled in other ways! :)
I was raped twice, at 7 and 9. I don't ever recall having any sexual attraction to anyone, although I MIGHT have, because I don't really have any memories of age 9 downwards and 10-16 is pretty hazy(I'm 18 btw). What should I do?
AnonymousI would say you should talk to someone more qualified than I am. You can major trauma in your life at a very young age and I cannot possibly know how that impacted you. The best advice I can give is to identify in a way that is comfortable.
Does gray sexuality have it's own flag/colours or is it the same as the one from asexuals?
AnonymousAs far as I know, it doesn’t have its own anything.
So I frequently find myself sexually attracted to various people, including my long-term boyfriend. However I do not enjoy sex. Sex isn't amazing to me like everybody says. I find it rather boring and pointless. I don't get overly turned on although I do often want to have sex but afterwards I usually wonder why I bothered because it's so mediocre and even the orgasm isn't really enjoyable. Could I possibly be gray-sexual?
AnonymousIf you are frequently sexually attracted to people, I don’t think I would call you gray-a because gray-a has to do with limited sexual attraction and is not related to enjoyment of sex. Some people just don’t like sex, or just aren’t having sex that is good for them. But sexual behavior and enjoyment is not the same as sexual attraction.
I'm not sure what this is but here it goes, I don't enjoy sex very much, I just enjoy pleasuring my partner. When they are feeling good it makes me feel good but I'd rather masterbate by myself than have sex. It feels like a chore to me & it really hurts. I don't like my nipples touched I feel nothing, I don't like intercourse with anything & I cannot have tampons in me because it hurts too bad & it's weird. The only thing I am okay with is having my clit touched & it's still embarrassing.
AnonymousThere is a difference between enjoying sex/sex acts and experiencing limited sexual attraction. And not everyone who generally likes sex necessarily likes penetrative sex.
I am not really sure if you are asking a question or just sharing so that you can get what you need to say off your chest. However, if you are looking for some sort of guidance I’d say that you should be clear about what you like and don’t like, what your boundaries are, and and generally how you feel about having sex with any and every partner. If you are only ok with clitoral stimulation, let your partner know. See if you can find a way for them to feel good that doesn’t cause you physical pain. Hopefully your partner doesn’t want to have sex that gives you undesirable pain.
I just recently discovered this and I am soooo happy! I didn't know other people like me were out there! This really isn't a question but I just really wanted to tell someone hope you don't mind :3
I’m glad it makes you happy!
For the anon who is wondering if Asexuals experience kissing and cuddling: I love to cuddle and kiss with my partner :) I think it varies from person to person
I was reading some of the other questions and you talked about how you had identified as a lot of different things throughout your life, if so what is the point of identifying at all?
AnonymousI like having words to describe things more concisely, and I also don’t think anyone’s label has to stay the same for their entire lives. I don’t identify as things for other people, but for myself. As I learn and understand more about myself, I use different words to describe who I am. It isn’t as if I had arbitrarily changed how I identified, but that I realized something and wanted to be able, if it came up, to have a more accurate term to use for myself.
Im still kinda trying to figure it all out, but I think I might identify as Gray-A, or maybe even possibly Asexual (biromantic). I'm having some confused feelings though, a lot of self doubt. Is it normal for Asexuals/Gray Asexuals to enjoy kissing/closed mouth "making out", and cuddling, even though they dont desire sex?
AnonymousI think so.
I am a completely common heterosexual girl despite the fact that I can't stand the idea of having sex or being touched or sharing my own body with somebody else. I'm not really fond of proximity and I don't really feel aroused toward people; flesh purely as flesh doesn't attract me in any way. I just fall for someone and want to be with them, but the idea of intimacy just terrifies me completely.
Anonymous
